Sports

Angry Bob’s Mid-Season Report Card: Philadelphia Eagles

The Philadelphia Eagles are at the halfway point of the season, so I thought I would tell you everything that is wrong with the team. Sure, the Eagles have a 5-3 record, but four of those wins came against teams with a combined 7-25 record. The other win came against a Giants team that is in complete free-fall. They even managed to lose to the 2-6 Oakland Raiders. You’ll excuse me if I’m not seeing a trip to the Super Bowl in the Eagles’ future. Anyway, let’s take a look at the first half. I will give each position a letter grade.

Quarterback - D

Well, Kevin Kolb started two games and threw for over 300 yards in each one with a 1-1 record. Not great, but at least we know now that he is better than he showed earlier in his career. What? That’s not what you were looking for? Oh, okay. Donovan McNabb is still the most inconsistent QB you will find in the NFL. He can be nearly perfect one week, like he was against the Giants and then be just God-awful another week, like he was against the Raiders. McNabb just doesn’t have “It” like all the great quarterbacks have.

Running back - C

I almost want to mark this one as incomplete since Brian Westbrook has been hurt so often. I fear that Westbrook is done. The shelf life of an average NFL RB is short. When they reach their expiration date the drop-off is sometimes steep. It appears that injuries have taken the great RB that we knew as Brian Westbrook and thrown him over a cliff.

LeSean McCoy looks like he has some real talent, but he is still a rookie. McCoy leads all rookies in yards from scrimmage with 511 yards, but he is struggling to pick up the blitz. Leonard Weaver has been a savior. Not only is he great at blocking, but he has shown that he can actually run with the football. Amazing what you can do when you have a real fullback on the roster isn’t it?

Wide Receiver - B

DeSean Jackson is the best player on the Eagles roster, by far. He is exciting to watch and opposing teams have to game plan for him. Andy Reid said he needs to find a way to get the ball into his hands more often after he was effectively taken out of the game by the Cowboys? Really Andy? You think?

Jason Avant is a decent third receiver who goes over the middle and picks up the tough yards and first downs. Every team needs someone like him. Kevin Curtis has been injured most of the season and like Westbrook, his career may be in jeopardy. Unlike everybody else, I have not been impressed with Jeremy Maclin so far. I told you all before the season that Maclin would produce next to nothing in his rookie season. Coming from a small school that ran a spread offense, I figured his learning curve would be extreme. The Curtis injury has accelerated that learning curve and Maclin has adjusted nicely. The problem is that besides the one big game where the Tampa Bay Bucs left him wide open to triple cover Jackson, Maclin has done almost nothing. He really looked like a rookie in causing two interceptions for McNabb against the Cowboys.

Tight End - A

Brent Celek leads all NFC tight ends in receiving yards and touchdowns. I’m not sure how much more you could possibly want out of your TE. He can block a little bit too, but the best part about Celek is that he’s not LJ Smith.

Offensive Line - F

If you think I’m being harsh, then consider that right tackle, Winston Justice, is probably the Eagles best offensive lineman. Think about that for a second and consider how bad that really is. Right tackle, Shawn Andrews, went crazy before the season and then got a “back injury.” His brother, right guard Stacy Andrews, was signed to a big contract and he’s now a backup. What a shock considering that Andy Reid scoffed at the notion that he might not be fully healed from December ACL surgery. Left guard, Todd Herremans, is just coming back from a broken foot. Center, Jamal Jackson, is average at best. Left tackle,  Jason Peters, absolutely sucks at left tackle after being obtained in a trade and signing a mega-contract. Last year he pouted about his contract and gave up 11-1/2 sacks in Buffalo. This year he got paid and it looks like that fat wallet is weighing him down or maybe he’s just a dog with fleas. This line can’t protect the QB or open any holes for the running game. Aren’t you glad that Andy Reid completely revamped this unit in the off-season?

Defensive Line - B

The Eagles are 2nd in the NFL with 27 sacks, led by Trent Cole’s 7-1/2. Besides Cole’s relentless pressure, the line has two solid tackles in Mike Patterson and Broderick Bunkley, who have helped the Eagles give up less than 100 yards per game on the ground. That’s good for 10th in the NFL against the run. With the mess at the LB position, that’s impressive.

Linebacker - D

This one could have been an F with all the problems this group has (not) covering TEs. Once MLB Stewart Bradley was lost for the season this group didn’t have a chance. They are on his 4th replacement now. Joe Mays is apparently too dumb. Omar Gaither is apparently too small. Jeremiah Trotter is obviously too old. Maybe Will Witherspoon is just right. Holy crap, this sounds like a football version of Goldilocks and the Three Bears. Akeem Jordan and Chris Gocong are average at best on the outside.

Cornerback - A

Sheldon Brown and Asante Samuel just might be the best starting tandem of cornerbacks in the NFL. Samuels has 5 interceptions and Brown has 4. Joselio Hanson is a decent backup, but he was just suspended for four games by the NFL for a failed drug test. To make matters worse going forward, Ellis Hobbs suffered a neck injury that is going to require surgery. He was placed on the IR. That first half “A” grade is going down in the second half.

Safety - C

Quintin Mikell has been great. He plays the run well and he plays the pass even better. The problem here is the revolving door at free safety. Back to Goldilocks and the Three Bears: Quintin Demps was too dumb. Macho Harris was too young. Now Sean Jones may be just right. None of this even should have been an issue if the dopes that run the Eagles hadn’t let Brian Dawkins get away as a free agent. His leadership has been sorely missed even more than his production on the field.

Special Teams - C

Punter Sav Rocca is too inconsistent. Place-kicker David Akers still has the leg but he’s missed some crucial field goals early. The coverage and return units have been a pleasant surprise so far this season. Put all together and it comes out to average.

Coaching - F

You might want to go take a bathroom break, this could take a while. OK, all set now? Defensive Coordinator, Sean McDermott, has exceeded my low expectations after the death of Jim Johnson, but this unit still fails to get off the field on third downs consistently enough. Offensive Coordinator, Marty Mornhinwig, is nothing but a pawn for Andy Reid and I won’t even bother critiquing his work.

Andy Reid is the worst coach in the history of organized sports. It’s not even a debate anymore. If you don’t think so, then you are a completely clueless about football. In his 11th year, he is still making all the same bone-headed mistakes. The failures with challenges. The poor time management. The lack of discipline among the players. The ridiculous lack of balance between the run and the pass. (He has thrown the ball more than any other coach in NFL history with a minimum of 100 games coached.) The complete inability to make even a single in-game adjustment. I can’t take it anymore.

The losses to the Raiders and the Cowboys can be laid squarely at the feet of Reid. He refused to even try to run the ball against the Raiders even though his quarterback was terrible. Reid’s horrible clock management and ridiculous decision to kick a field goal down 7 points against the Cowboys led directly to that loss. The Eagles are now 1-8-1 in their last 10 games decided by six points or less. There couldn’t possibly be a more damning stat against Reid than one that proves his team can’t win in the clutch. Maybe he should go manage the NY Mets.

General Manager - F

Unless you believe that Team President, Joe Banner, is actually the GM because he controls the money, then this is Andy Reid’s fault too. He totally rebuilt the offensive line and it has been a complete disaster. He drafted skill position players like Jeremy Maclin instead of trading that pick for an established stud WR like Anquan Boldin. Unless you only want to be good and stay good, instead of trying to win a Super Bowl, that was a bad move.

Why the hell did Reid sign Michael Vick? I tried to tell everyone that Vick is the most overrated player in the history of the NFL, but I got all kinds of crap. Well, how do you like the dog-killer now? He sucks and Reid is a complete idiot for signing him. To make matters worse, Reid doesn’t appear to have any idea how to use Vick or run any plays out of the Wildcat formation. (Reid burned a crucial 2nd half timeout against the Cowboys because of the confusion of switching from a Vick-led Wildcat formation back to a traditional McNabb-led formation.) Hey Andy, watch the tape of the Dallas loss to see how the Cowboys ran it and scored a TD on you, dopey. Here’s a hint: pull a guard. Oh wait, your best guard is still gimpy from off-season ACL surgery. Even if Vick was useful in the Wildcat, it wasn’t worth the fire-storm the team endured. This was a colossal error, but it wasn’t the worst one Andy the GM made.

No, that would be the decision to not resign safety Brian Dawkins. I already explained how the team is on its third replacement for Dawkins at the halfway point of the season. That proves that they needed him on the field. But more importantly than Dawkins contributions on the field was what he provided for the locker room. He was the one and only leader on the team. McNabb is a clown and there are a lot of young players on this roster that need guidance. Reid realized his error quickly, which is why he brought back Jeremiah Trotter. The problem is that Dawkins can still play (in Denver) and Trot can’t.

The only thing that kept this from being an F- is that the team pulled off a nice trade-deadline trade for middle linebacker, Will Witherspoon. Too little too late to save this season if you ask me.

I predicted a losing record for the team this season and I’m pretty confident that they will deliver on that prediction for me. They only managed a 5-3 record against the dregs of the NFL and the Saints. The schedule gets considerably harder in the 2nd half and Andy isn’t going to suddenly get smarter. It is going to be a long cold winter for the fans of the Philadelphia Eagles. I can only hope that this inevitable failure leads to the firing of the worst coach in the history of organized sports. And he can take his QB with him too. After a decade of not winning, I’m done with both of them.

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